Do you control your own destiny?

What is “Destiny”? Is it something you can control? Is it the same as “Fate”? Can you do anything to control it? Destiny and Fate are used inter changeable quite often but do they mean the same? The technical definition of these two words is quite interesting.

“Fate” is an outcome determined by an outside agency acting upon a person or entity; but with “Destiny” the entity is participating in achieving an outcome that is directly related to itself. Modern usage defines fate as a power or agency that predetermines and orders the course of events. Fate defines events as ordered or "inevitable". Fate is used in regard to the finality of events as they have worked themselves out; and that same sense of finality, projected into the future to become the inevitability of events as they will work themselves out, is Destiny.

Some people don’t believe in this theory at all. They are clairvoyant and believe that “A person makes his own destiny” This may be true. However you’re “Attitude” has a big role to play here. Some people feel very nervous when they are in situations where they are not in control of the events or the things that are happening to them.

Some also say that you pay for your sins in this same life and this makes it their “Fate”. Take for example a person who is suffering from a fatal disease or even for that matter a medical condition for which the treatment is next to impossible or the surgical treatment carries such high risk that the person would rather choose to live with it instead of go through the surgical intervention. What would you call this? Is it his “fate”? Does it mean he has sinned earlier in his life for which he is now paying for?

It’s all about “Attitude” and how you react to it. You can choose to accept it as your “Fate” and suffer your whole life or you change your attitude and learn to fight it. A great way to shut the pain is to ignore it all together. Now this is easier said than done but it is possible. I am speaking from personal experience. It’s also called “Awareness”. You have arms and legs and their purpose is to help the motion of your body. You carry on with your daily chores without being aware of them. But on one fine day you have a pain in the leg and you become “aware” of it. The more you pay attention to it the more it hurts. But if you ignore it and shift the focus of your mind to something else you will realize that the pain doesn’t feel as bad or it sometimes vanishes. At that point you may or may not choose to treat it.

“Not complaining is sometimes viewed as the most valued complaint.”

I am not saying you adopt the same attitude towards the problems in your life or at work. I have worked for and with people who shut their eyes to the problems and hope that they would go away. Believe me - it’s incredibly pain full to work for such people. Problems do not go away on their own, you are just ignoring them and leaving someone else to fight with them and find a solution. This is what I call as being “Ignorant”. This can back fire and prove fatal at times.

I do agree with the group that strongly believes in being control of their own destiny. At the same time I feel that it takes a great deal of positive attitude to achieve that state. Being in consulting world I am a firm believer of the quote “The only thing constant is the change”. So as long as you believe in yourself and are receptive to adjust, accommodate and factor for the “Unexpected” you will control your own destiny. And more than ever you need to forget the “past”, believe in “today” and not worry about the “future”.

Like the great master Oogway in the movie Kung Fu Panda says “Yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift which is why it’s called present”.